Day 76 - 24

Weigh in 14/8/2007





Last night was weigh in didn't get time to post but have lost 7lbs this week which I am really please with considering the difficulties that I had getting back to 100% abstinence. Will post a bit more in the morning.

Anita.

Day 75 - 25

I finally feel like I have turned a corner, today I haven't felt at all hungry. I feel completely in control again, no thoughts of cheating. I have managed to drink about 6 litres of water and had my first shake at about 2.30 and the last two packs about an hour ago. I did some gardening yesterday, well not really gardening but planting things in pots. Our garden is small and is divided up in to two areas of decking, one outside of the conservatory and another raised area at the bottom of the garden and the bit in the middle is scottish pebbles and a few paving slab. So no grass or borders just tubs and pots which makes life really easy. It was nice to get out in the sunshine after being at work all week. The rest of the day was spent catching up with housework. After returning from holiday really didn't feel like doing anything after work all week. Matt spent all afternoon ironing whilst watching every extreme sport or bike channel he could find, I'm sure thats why he volunteers to do the ironing so that I won't have any reason to complain about him watching TV.

Not much has happened to day, just a busy day at work. This evening we went to visit M's brother and his wife with their new baby. He's now 3 months old and really gorgeous considering he doesn't know us very well he was happy to sit with both of us and chat away despite the fact he was due a feed.

Its weigh in tomorrow and I will get LLC to confirm when my hundred days are up - but I guess it will be when we have completed all the tasks in the green book.

I am trying to work out how to put photos on here hopefully will be able to do it over the next couple of days.

Feeling tired now so think it must be time for bed,so night night for know.

Anita x

Day 74 - 26

Where has the time gone - As mentioned in my last post have really struggled with updating on here but have know been out and treated myself to a laptop so no excuses anymore.

My class has been messed about a bit we seemed to have new people starting right up to week 5, I think this was because our class was so small - 4 at the start and then one couldn't carry on after a couple of weeks so down to 3 which didn't give much interaction in the classes. So although I have been doing the packs for 74 days I'm not sure when foundation will actually end for me. Last week we were doing the tasks for week 7 which seems to have gone wrong somewhere cos it should have been week 9 by my calculation - the class started on 12 June. I don't mind because having had two weeks holiday I only seem to have missed one lot of tasks from the green book and I'm trying to catch up ready for Tuesday. When I first started my plan was to follow foundation and then go straight into management regardless of how much I had left to lose, and lose the last by more conventional dieting methods but I think my thoughts on this have changed reading lots of threads on minimins.com and blogs on here and my recent experiences. I have just returned from 2 weeks holiday in France where I had a fantastic holiday but I did break abstinence. The first week was not too much of a problem I was just enjoying having the odd taste of things but keeping to the shakes and bars during the day and having a small salad with lowfat protein for my evening meal. I did have an Ice Cream one dya but I didn't have my shake and when I put on a pair of trousers to go out at the end of the first week they actually felt looser than the last time I had worn them. I think it helped that we were doing a lot of walking to the beach which involved getting over a huge sand dune (if anyone knows SW France they will know that this no easy task) and cycling every other day. One day we went for a ride using some of the cycle routes through the Landes Forest and ended up cycling 21 miles round trip. In the 2nd week however I felt less in control and seemed to be more influenced by what other people were eating and started eating at lunch time and in the evening and this usually involved bread or crackers, small amounts of cheese, the lovely french cured hams etc etc. I even succombed to croissants for breakfast on a couple of days. I don't know what went wrong and what dissappointed me the most about it was that I didn't really enjoy the things I was eating but this didn't seem to stop me. We got back late last Saturday evening and I had decided as it was one of my daughters birthday on the sunday and she had been house and cat sitting for us while we were on holiday that we would take her and her friend out for lunch and this would be my last meal and back on the packs Monday morning. This was fine had a lovely salad and lots of sparkling water, it was quite late in the afternoon so didn't need anythng else to eat later. Monday morning arrived and straight back into normal routine of taking 2 packs to work, didn't find it too difficult getting back on the packs, I wsan't particularly hungry and found the water quite easy upto 5 litres each day. At weigh in on Tuesday I had gained 4 lbs which I wasn't too upset about but I think my actual gain was nearer to 7 lbs when I weighed at home on Sunday. What I have found really dificult was to stop picking at things and towards the end of the week actually eating whole things. This was really confusing as I wasn't hungry, not particularly stressed but cross with myself for not being able to do things how I had before my holiday. I had found the whole thing really easy and that was part of my reason for deciding to eat on holiday because i thought i would be ok when i got back. After a particualrly bad day on friday when I ate a cinnamon cake a whole bag of wine gums and a cold sausage I decided to post a thread on minimins.com (back on track is my name on there) to see if anyone could give me any advice the replys were really supportive and I don't know if it was just actually writing down what I had done and therefore actually admitting it or what it was but yesterday was a completely different sort of day refocused and only had my 4 packs and about 5 litres of water and I am feeling really pleased with myself although as I write this my tummy is growling at me, I think I might have to get up and have a shake (this laptop is brilliant as hubby lays next to me sleeping I can update to my hearts content without getting moaned at for spending too much time on computer). My weight is starting to drop off and I am a bit lighter than my preholiday weight so hopefully by tuesday will show a good loss and be back in ketosis.

My plan know is to carry on in development when the time comes and lose all my weight and then do management as I don't think I am ready to do things on my own, maybe this might change again as I get back into foundation who knows! This is someting I have noticed from other peoples blogs and postings that they keep changing their minds the closer to target they get.

I think I have rambled on enough for now hope to have your comments.

Bye for now.

Anita x

Day 18 - 82

It's been ages since I seem to have been able to get on the computer to update my blog. For some reason it wont let me sign in at work to update mine but will let me leave comments on others, which is the ideal place for me to do it as computer at home is monopolised by my 13 year old daughter in the evenings.

So here goes with catch up.

Any way have been doing really well, started class last tuesday which was very small only 4 people but LLC did say she had 3 more people coming to introduction on saturday so they may start this week. Every one was really nice and really looking forward to getting in to this side of it, the weight loss is going really well I am so pleased. At weigh in I have lost 13lbs, a bit dissappointed it wasn't a whole stone but still very pleased with the results so far.

Hubby and I went out for the day on Sunday to Lulworth Cove in Dorset, we were planning on taking the walk over the cliffs to Durdle Door but it was far to hot. So we laid on the beach for a while then Matt needed food so we sat outside a cafe for an hour or so while he ate and I drank a bottle of sparkling water. Found it surprisingly easy to do as not at all hungry. We then did have a short walk to a viewing point part way up the cliff walk. So much for good intentions!!

Exercise is somewhere that I am struggling a bit - I have a frozen shoulder which is very painful a lot of the time and I'm not really sure other than walking what I could do. I really do need to get moving again as I find my muscles get really tired and heavy when i do anything even slightly strenuous. I don't know if that is a cause of LL or just my lack of exercise since the shoulder started. Used to do yoga once a week and a couple of sessions at the gym before it started.

Yesterday we went to a BBQ which was being held by a friend I used to work with. She finished with LL about a month ago and has done really well, still keeping her weight off even after a trip to go shopping in Florida with her daughter who had also done the programme with her. They both looked absolutely fantastic, infact I nearly didn't recognise her daughter. They both offered a lot of encouragement and were very inpressed with my loss so far. However there was another lady there who has lost about 5 stone with weight watchers over the last couple of years who was very negative about what I was doing and how she knows 'lots of people' who have been really ill doing LL although she couldn't actually tell me how many or what illness they had. Until then I had not heard of anyone who has had any health problems from following the programme and it made me abit angry that she couldn't see the postive effect it has had on at least two people at the event and potentially a third in the making. Apart from my shoulder I haven't felt this good in a long time.

Today my sister is coming round while Matt goes to his Taekwondo lesson and we are going to sort through all the clothes I have stashed away in the loft. Hopefully this will give me things to wear whilst losing weight as I have a load of clothes still with the labels on that I was going to lose half a stone or so to fit in to comfortably and never did. I also hope to get rid of loads of things that are already too big and winter things that I won't need next winter.

There are probably loads of things I've forgotten about over the last ten days but I think that will do and I will try and keep upto date each day.

Bye for now!

Day 8 - 92

Feeling really good again today, my family and everybody at work is being very supportive. What I am finding odd is that some people at work find it necessary to apologise because they are eating near me, I have told them that it doesn't effect me but they still seem to be very embarrased - they weren't bothered before I started this so not sure why they should be now.

I need to lose another 3-4lbs to put my weight back to my average weight over the last 4-5 years and I hope this will happen before I start my class properly on Tuesday, I will then feel that I have started from my normal weight rather than what I have put on this year since Christmas and my Nan's death when my eating seemed to get way out of control.

I have spent this evening organising menus for everyone else for the next couple of weeks so that I can create a sensible shopping list to start to show that this is not costing us anymore than the average shopping bill each week. Menus are done, shopping list done and there doesn't seem to be very much on it which is good.

I'm feeling very tired now, I still don't seem to be sleeping very well - not sure if it's the need for the toilet or some other reason but I hope it will settle down soon.

Bye for now

Day 7 - 93

Today is weigh in day looking forward to the official result, although I have weighed at home. I weighed myself at home last Thursday morning and have weighed myself this morning and it shows a 10lbs loss!! I'm amazed I never thought I would lose this much in one week, can't wait until tonight to get this confirmed.

I know I keep going on about it but I just can't get used to not being hungry, I keep drinking my water, both still and sparkling and black coffee and peppermint tea and I seem to forget about mealtimes so I am not having my packs at regular times during the day. When you diet normally you are constantly thinking about when you will eat your next allowed item of food and invariably end up eating it sooner than you planned and then spend the whole evening thinking you must be able to have something else - this plan just doesn't make you think like that. I am so focussed on consuming the quantity of water and other drinks that you need to have that I seem to forget about food altogether - It's amazing.

Weighed in at 6 pm and the official wight loss is 9lbs, this could be something to do with the litre of water I drank on the way from work to LLC.

Really pleased with the results for such little effort!

Day 6 - 94

Thankfully feeling much better today, still a bit grumbly but don't feel sick any more. I didn't have my last shake yesterday and still don't want one this morning. The peppermint tea helped with the sicky feelings.

I finally had my first shake at about 12.30, now I'm worried that I wont fit in my fourth one again today need to have a plan for this evening to make it happen.

Had quite a busy day at work, there are a few changes going on but it's good for me as I'm getting some different things to do, this stops me getting bored. Late home from work tonight and as Matt's not back from Birmingham yet need to prepare dinner for him and my youngest daughter. I am very surprised that cooking for other people doesn't seem to be bothering me, although I'm not going to let Matt know that as it will be nice to have the odd night off from thinking about ideas for dinner and then cooking it.

In order to make sure that I have my four packs today I made some crisps from a Thai Chilli pack and had a shake with them. The crisps weren't to bad although some of them were a bit soggy, I would make them again. I will have my last shake just before bed.

It's weigh in tomorrow looking forward to seeing what I've done in the first week.

Day 5 - 95

My youngest daughter had friend to stay last night as they didn't have school today - what a mistake, they were still making loads of noise at 1am and Matthew had to get up at 5.45 this morning as he had to go to Birmingham for a couple of days with work. So today I have been very tired, I also have a really gripey and gurgly tummy which has got worse as the day has gone on. I don't know if this is anything to do with LL or just something going around.

I still don't feel hungry(may be connected to upset tummy), had a shake at about 10.30 this morning and another at about 2pm. I wanted to cycle to my sisters house so I thought I should have my soup before I went so I had that at about 6.30 but wasn't really hungry and my stomach has been feeling worse since, it's now 10pm and I'm not sure whether I can manage my 4th pack. Is this normal? and does anyone know if it will hurt for me not to have it?

I think I might go and have a soak in the bath and see if it makes me feel any better.

Bye for now.

Day 4 - 96

I don't seem to be able to get into a good routine with this blog, wrote a lot in my journal today trying to get upto date with my thoughts over the last week or so, I could do that lying in the garden and being a bit of a sun worshipper I couldn't miss out on the lovely sunshine to sit at the computer. May be I should treat myself to a laptop then I could do this anywhere. After worrying a bit about how I would cope at the weekends without work to keep me occupied I have found the whole weekend really easy. I haven't been hungry and even struggled to have my fourth pack this evening, just didn't feel I needed it but thought I better as I didn't know how it would effect me tomorrow.

Getting a bit bored with plain water, although I do normally drink quite a lot of water, when it is the only thing you can have it gets a bit tedious. I have been having black coffee and I bought some peppermint tea which I am enjoying but I think I will buy some water flavouring when I go for my weigh in on Wednesday just to ring the changes and maybe make some ice lollies for when it is hot.

With my daughter and her boyfriend staying for the weekend I thought it would be nice to have a family meal this afternoon, now I feel quite proud of myself. I cooked new potatoes, jacket potatoes, chicken portions, prepared a salad with hardboiled eggs and grated cheese and then sat with them and had a raspberry shake! This the first sort of organised meal I have encountered since starting as we don't seem to have all been in at the same time for meals over the last few days and I found it remarkably easy - the difficult bit was clearing away the leftover new potatoes and boiled eggs - in the past I probably would have just popped one in my mouth and not thought anything of it but I am so focused I didn't feel that I needed to.

So I have completed 1/25 of the programme and I hope the next 24/25 are as easy!!!!

Day 3 - 97

Didn't get time to post yesterday after making decision that after drop in with LLC (which actually gave great result of 6lbs lost) to go for a nice long bike ride in the countryside, all the plans changed when my daughter phoned to ask if we would like some cheap concert tickets. The Who were playing in concert at The Rose Bowl (Hampshire Cricket Ground) which is about 2 miles from where we live. So that's what we did!!!

The concert was really good the support acts were good as well, one being the Magic Numbers which are a group I like. It was really great to here all the old Who hits and lots of newer stuff as well. Roger Daltrey just never seems to look any older. The atmosphere was really great, huge range of ranges at 43 I felt quite young, but the oldies certainly new how to enjoy themselves!! We cycled to the Rose Bowl and left our bikes at my daughters friends house which is very close to the venue. The only two things I found difficult being on the LL plan were when we arrived I was very hot from cycling and everybody was drinking cold lager which would have been great to have had and later when I wanted to mix my shake I felt that people were watching me (although they probably weren't). All in all we had a fantastic day, managed to drink about 5 litres of water and not too much coffee and I wasn't really hungry.

Feeling really positive having lost 6lbs in 2 1/2 days I can't help wondering what I might lose by weigh in on Wednesday, I am finding the whole thing quite easy at the moment, long may it continue.

Day 2 - only 98 to go!

Woke up quite hungry this morning, but busied myself with some chores and a bit of TV before going to work. Have decided to have my first shake at work when I feel I need it as black coffee and pint of water seemed to have quashed my hunger. I am finding it quite strange that I don't even seem to be thinking about food.

I weighed myself this morning which showed a great result of 3lbs in just one day!!! Here's hoping for 1/2 stone by the time I get weighed on Saturday at my drop in.

I have tried the Raspberry, Chicken and Vegetable packs so far today - thumbs up to Raspberry and Chicken and the vegetable was Ok with a bit of salt & pepper.

Needed to shop for the family tonight so dragged Matt along with me because I think need to start how I want to carry on and that is for him to be more involved in shopping and preparing dinner for him and the girls. Infact it will probably only be him and my youngest daughter most nights as my middle daughter tends to fly in from work and then fly out again to whatever social occasion she has that evening, with no time for dinner!!

I am a bit worried about how I am going to cope with weekends when I am at home around food, however I have just sat with my husband and my eldest daughter, who has come home from London for the weekend with her boyfriend and they have been drinking rum and coke and eating cashew nuts that I found when tidying up the cupboards this evening. Although my sense of smell seems to have increased and they did smell delicious (cashews are my favourite nut) and I didn't feel at all tempted - just wish I had found them a few days ago and I could have had some before I started the plan.

Still feeling really positive, can't wait for the class to start, I am really looking forward to meeting the group.

Trying to keep up with the water but found it a bit harder today. I think it was because very busy at work and also forgot to take my bottle with me to Tescos. I was planning on drinking a litre whilst wandering around the shop, I should have just bought one there I suppose but only remembered about half way round.

I hope whoever reads this is doing really well and I hope to get to know a few of the people who's blogs I have been reading - they are all truly inspirational.

Bye for now.

I guess I just need the weather to be good so as we can get out and about, quite fancy taking the bikes out and having a good ride either along the coast or perhaps the New Forest. There are also alot of jobs that need doing in the garden so that should keep me going - fingers crossed for some sunshine!!

Day 1 - here we go

Not sure where to begin (never done this blog thing before) but I guess a bit about me - I'm 43, married to Matthew for 4 1/2 years. I have 3 daughters from a previous marriage aged 21, 19 and 13. I work in a multi franchise garage as a sales administrator and I'm thinking now that the last day of the month was probably not a good day to start as it can be quite stressful - but being busy might help.

I seem to have always been on a 'diet' of some sort, I was always a lot bigger than my peers at school and my sister who is about the same height as me (5' 4") was always about a stone lighter than me even at my lightest of 9st 4lbs. Even then I thought I was fat but i think that was a lot to do with my parents who are very hung up about weight. I think this has had a long term effect on me and food was something I could control.

I don't think I have ever been as apprenhensive of something as I have been with starting this final attempt, I guess it is the unknown, having dieted for years losing weight after christmas before holidays, then gaining on holidays and losing again ready for christmas, i seem to have been the same weight for years. The thought of not eating anything is quite scary but I think this is the only way for me to beat my obsession with food.

I am really looking forward to actually starting at the meetings-it's a shame it's not sooner. I'm due to pop in to my counsellor on Saturday for a bit of support and to see how much I have lost!

Found it really difficult to decide which food packs to choose when presented with the list yesterday - but decided to try a few of each. So far today I have had a strawberry shake, mushroom soup and thai chilli soup, really enjoyed the strawberry shake and the thai chilli soup - not so keen on the mushroom though.

I'm going to buy a better hand blender than the cheap option I bought years ago, got splattered by my soup this evening - I need one with its own cup/jug. Only time I felt really hungry was when I got home from work, but I was later than usual, I made my soup as soon as I got in as no one else in for dinner. My middle daughter then came home from the gym and cooked herself fishcake and chips, which smelt devine.

I'm almost there with the water about 1/2 litre to go - I've found it better to drink the water at room temperature maybe because its so cold and miserable outside. So far so good, I'm feeling really positive and think waffling away on here is going to help, I've told lots of people what I am doing and they are all being really supportive, most people are really curious about the diet but I guess they migh become bored with it after my constant talking about it.

The more I have talked about the diet the more people I have found who have done LL and been very succesful so here's to the start of one more success!!

Matthew is due back from his Taekwondo class any minute so need to stick his dinner in the oven and make my last shake - think I might have a hot chocolate one. Oh yes and finish my water!!!!!